Women

Complete List of Pick Up Lines

  • Mines bigger than his want proof?
  • Miss, If you’ve lost your virginity, can I have the box it came in?
  • My bed is broken. Can I sleep in yours?
  • My dick just died. Would you mind if I buried it in your ass?
  • My dick’s been feeling a little dead lately. Wanna give it some mouth-to-mouth?
  • My ex-girlfriend used to call me Goldfinger.
  • Look at my lips and your lips. They want to massage each other.
  • My face is leaving in fifteen minutes. Be on it.
  • Look out in the night sky. You see that bright light to the right of that red one? That is a comet that is streaking toward here at 34546 miles per hour. At that rate, it will be here in about an hour. So, wanna fuck?
  • My friend and I made a bet and I need to check if those are implants.
  • Lets play titanic youll be the ocean and ill go down on you
  • Lets skip all the bull-shit lose our inhibitions and DO what we really came here to do.
  • Let me eat you for an hour. If you don’t want to have sex after that, we won’t.
  • Life is like a dick. When it gets hard, “Fuck it”.
  • Let us let only latex stand between our love.
  • Life is short. Let’s f**k and see if there is anything after that.
  • Let’s bypass all the bullshit and just get naked.
  • Let’s go fuck in a brand new limo.
  • Let’s go to your place and love each other until my dick falls in your pussy.
  • Let’s have a party and invite your pants to come on down.
  • Let’s just fuck.
  • Let’s not mess with nature. We are here to make babies. So, let’s get to it.
  • Lets play “Titanic.” When I say “Iceburg!” you do down.
  • Just remember: To you, I am a virgin.
  • It sure is hot and stuffy in here. Would you like to take a cold shower?
  • I’ve got a big one, you wanna see how hard it works?
  • I’ve got a condom with your name on it.
  • I’ve got a great big cock!
  • I’ve got a hummer and a vibrator. Which one do you want to test drive first?
  • I’ve got skittles in my mouth, wanna taste the rainbow?
  • Is it that cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tac’s in your bra?
  • I’m not too good at algebra, but doesn’t U+I = 69?
  • Is that a keg in your pants? Because I’d love to tap that ass.
  • I’m not trying to pressure you. I don’t want to have sex without mutual consent; oh and by the way, you have my consent.
  • Is you father a lumberjack [No, why?] Because when ever I look at you, I get wood in my pants.
  • I’m on fire. Can I run through your sprinkler?
  • Is your dad a farmer? (No, why?) Because you got some melons.
  • I’m peanut butter, you’re jelly, let’s have sex.
  • I’m scared of getting pregnant, so do you want to go up to my room & test out all of my condoms?
  • I’m the doctor of love baby and you’re over due for your meat injection!
  • I’m the finger down your spine when all the lights go out.
  • I’m trying to determine after years of therapy and lots of testing, whether or not I’m allergic to sex.
  • I’m with the TSA and I need to perform a full body cavity search, for security reasons.
  • Is it cold in here, or are you just happy to see me.
  • I’m conducting a survey on the taste of vaginas. Wanna be my first
  • I’m not an expert in hardware, but I know that you’d be able to screw my nuts off.
  • I’m either going home with you or behind you, take your pick.
  • I’m feeling a little off today. Would you like to turn me on?
  • I’m going outside to make out… care to join me?
  • I’m gonna have sex with you tonight so, you might as well be there.
  • I’m hard. You wet?
  • I’m leaving this place … want to cum?
  • I’m like a Rubik’s Cube, the more you play with me the harder I get!
  • I’m a starving artist and I want to eat you.
  • If you talk to me, I’ll fuck you.
  • If you were a car, I’d wax you and ride you all over town.
  • If your left leg was Christmas and your right was Thanksgiving, could I visit between the holidays?
  • If you’re feeling down, I can fill you up.
  • I’ll bet you $10 my dick can’t fit into your mouth.
  • I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
  • I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.
  • I’ll suck you so hard that you’ll have to pick the sheets out of your ass when I’m finished.
  • I’m a freelance gynecologist. How long has it been since your last checkup?
  • I’m a Love Pirate, and I’m here for your booty! ARRRGGGHHH!!!
  • If I gave you a sexy negligee, would there be anything in it for me?
  • If I had AIDS, would you have sex with me? [No] Well, I don’t, so let’s go.
  • If I said you had a nice body, would you hold it against me?
  • If I take off my clothes, will you fuck me?
  • If I told you I had a 2 inch dick would you f**k me? [No] Good, because mine is 8 inches.
  • If I was a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seed?
  • If I was hungry for crabs would you spread your legs for me?
  • If I’m a pain in your ass… We can just add more lubricants.
  • If it’s true that we are what we eat, I could be you by morning!
  • If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
  • I would fuck you so hard, you’d learn from it.
  • I’d give you a piece of my mind, but I’ve got more of something else.
  • I’d like to get between your legs and eat my way straight to your heart…
  • I’d like to wrap your legs around my head and wear you like a feed bag.
  • I’d really like to see how you look when I’m naked.
  • I love my bed but I’d rather be in yours.
  • I love you, I want to marry you. Now fuck my brains out.
  • I may not be Fred Flintstone, but I bet I can make your bed rock!
  • I think I’m in heaven because you look like an angel. Can you take off your shirt so that I can check for wings?
  • I think it is time I tell you what people are saying behind your back. Nice Ass!
  • I think that pick-up lines are for people with to much time on their hands. Let’s just f**k.
  • I think that we might be related. Let me check for the family birthmark on your chest.
  • I WANT SEX! Sorry, the doctor said that would help….
  • I lost my virginity. Can I have yours?
  • I have a 13 inch dick. Remember that, there will be an oral exam later.
  • I have a big headache. I hear the best cure for headaches is sex. What say we go upstairs and work out a remedy.
  • I had a wet dream about you last night. Would you like to make it a reality?
  • I like your hair, your eyes, your smile… I like every bone in your body… Especially mine!
  • I had sex with someone last night. Was that you?
  • I have a job for you, but it blows!
  • I have an “owie” on my lip. Will you kiss it and make it better?
  • I have an oral fixation with giving oral gratification. If you are willing to receive I am more than willing to give.
  • I have the entire dictionary written on my dick. Want me to put some words in your mouth??
  • Hi. I’m horny.
  • I don’t know you, and you don’t know me, but who’s to say it’s wrong if we sleep together?
  • Hold out two fingers and say: “Why should a woman masturbate with these two fingers?” (I don’t know.) “Cause they’re mine sweetheart.”
  • I got a 14 inch cock, why don’t you come home with me and I’ll let you ride



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AlphaX is a C level executive and unconventional philanderer who specializes in self development, human behavior, and seduction. He has been a writer for Askmen.com, SoSauve.com, ReturnOfKings.com as well as having been interviewed for Double Your Dating Interview Series by David DeAngelo, on the Advanced Dating Techniques DVD as well as the Cliff’s List DVD series.

He currently offers training and practical advice for attracting women at Politically Incorrect Publications.

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